Journal Prompts to Support A Fluid Self-Care Lifestyle

Our lives are constantly changing. We’re growing older, moving through different stages of maturity and development, meeting new people, exploring new places, and, of course, experiencing ourselves in unique and beautiful ways. As a result, the way we take care of ourselves has to change alongside us.

Pregnancy has reaffirmed this lesson for me and the knowledge that we can never assume what another person needs – I believe our individual experience is too subtle, so subtle in fact that we, ourselves, may have trouble deciphering what we need! One of the things I frequently see within my clientele and community is the breakdown of self-care routines when life circumstances change. We tend to get into habits or find practices that work for us in a specific way and want to roll with them – because, let’s face it, once we have that down, it’s one less thing to figure out, but the problem is this is a perfect recipe for our self-care to become a task list that saps our energy and does the exact opposite of what’s intended. Self-care can’t be bottled or packaged; there’s no magic formula and no one-size-fits-all. 

Deep listening is the only key to unlocking its full power to change our lives. 

I’ve put together 3 of my most helpful self-inquiry questions that can support you in this deep listening process, help you pivot your self-care, and support you through any current changes you may be experiencing. Sit with them, journal on them, and let them move through you.

3 Questions to Support A Fluid Self-Care Lifestyle

1. In what way has your inner and outer experience changed and shifted in the last couple of months, and how have these changes affected you and your connection to your Self?
2. What’s present for you now – are there sensations, thoughts, urges, or emotions that need your attention?
3. Based on what’s present, what do you need:
   1. Mentally?
   2. Physically?
   3. Emotionally?
   4. Spiritually?

Usually, I find the best thing to do after an inquiry like this is to take immediate action. Count yourself down from five, stand up and provide yourself with at least some of what you need. This is the beginning of a fluid self-care lifestyle, one that doesn’t rely on any routine except the practice of checking in with ourselves, listening, and honouring what we hear and feel.

Never mind the whole transition into motherhood, a growing belly and the fact that an entire human is growing inside me – I couldn’t have predicted the nuances of what I have needed so far within each trimester, each month, and each week. I’m sure, if you’re a mother reading this, you may be going, “oh, I could have told you that!” But the truth is, you couldn’t have told me what changes would stand out to me the most, what I would have the most difficulty with, and in what ways my needs would change because you’re not me. 

For instance, I’ve learned to rely heavily on my moon – or menstrual cycle. It’s a beautiful time of the month for me where I can say no with conviction and zero guilt, honour my body and let go of all the emotions that have built up over the month; I’ve learned to treat it as a ceremony and the more I’ve treated it as one, the stronger my relationship with myself gets. Regardless of how happy I was to be pregnant again after my first miscarriage, no one could have told me about the waves of grief that would wash over me around not having my moon throughout the first trimester. 

Returning to these questions helped me through a completely new experience by connecting me with my Self and powerful intuition. What I needed at that time was deep quiet, room to be me and experience these brand new aspects of myself without social interference, and so much rest.

Thankfully, I also had the Wilder Community at my side – a group of women who meet on zoom throughout the month to do this exact work together. Sure, we show up for each other, support each other and forge deep connections, but we’re each there for ourselves – which deepens the trust between us that much more.